I’ve got the blues.

Another week comes to an end, yet I find myself not nearly as enthused as I should be that it’s the weekend. I think I’ve got a case of the blues and I can’t quite shake it lately. I’m not even sure what snowballed it into the beast that it is now, but I do know that I just want to sleep until I feel better.

My son was excellent at school most of the week this week. Yesterday however he had a terrible day and got in trouble when he got home. That wasn’t the way I wanted to kick off my weekend. Today I was planning on signing him up for soccer, that’s not going to happen now. Our agreement with him in order for him to get involved in activities like that was he had to be on good behavior all week at school. Well he wasn’t so now he knows that there is a consequence for his actions. I hate having to be the bad guy about stuff like this, but we’ve discovered recently if we remain lax on the issue he gets lazy and won’t behave at school. We had to take a firm stand and punishment has to be doled out every time he’s not on good behavior. If I make exceptions for one situation he uses that to his advantage and expects me to allow him to slide for every situation and that’s simply not happening anymore. Up to this point I’ve been a pushover when it comes to giving in to him and I’ve been a very laid back parent. However the older he gets the more he knows how far to push that envelope to get the odds to turn out in his favor. He’s smart and that’s the issue because he thinks like an adult in certain situations and I’m definitely not used to a child who’s on my level. Don’t get me wrong smart is good, but too smart can be irritating at times.

Work is going great. I’m almost done with my training period. The past few days I’ve submitted my claims for review and not gotten any errors. It was a good feeling to know that I had two perfect days in a row. Tuesday and Wednesday were my perfect days. We’re still waiting to get the results back from Thursday and Friday hasn’t been submitted for review yet. My Monday was horrible, so the next few days of awesome sure did make up for it.

Home life is going well. Counting down the days until I can get out of this ghetto apartment complex and move somewhere decent. Lately things have gotten so bad here I’m about to pull my hair out. I could list the things that I hate about this place but that would be a hefty read. I pay over $700 a month in rent I expect better for my money, however I am sadly disappointed every time we walk in the door or drive through the parking lot. It wasn’t a bad place when we moved in two years ago, but now it’s just gone to hell. We’re looking into renting a house. I think I’ve had enough of apartment living for my lifetime. I want a place that I won’t grow out of as readily and that I can feel like home in. Once we get our credit cleared up (well my credit mostly) and start building up some strong positive credit (get my car paid off), we’ll look into buying a house. I think that’ll take at least 5 years or so. I want to get the best rate for buying a home and not get stiffed with high interest rates on a mortgage because my FICO score isn’t where it should be. Here’s hoping for the best!

I haven’t been writing recently because I can’t seem to muster the motivation to do it. Like I said I’ve been feeling kinda blue lately. I try to play on the computer or watch movies or television, but it’s all very uninteresting to me right now. I went to the gym once this past week because every weeknight when I go it’s just packed in there and I hate having to wait for machines or weights. So I made excuses and skipped out the other nights. How can a person who knows that they are slipping into a depression stop the actions from happening? My mind understands the symptoms and knows that it’s not a good state of mind to be in, yet I can’t seem to fix the problem. It’s weird. I haven’t had a good depressive bout in a long time, maybe I’m just overdue? I just need some good comfort food (or chocolate) and something nice and warm to drink. My life is so good right now so why the hell am I so sad? Any suggestions or comments would be appreciated!